Mending holes.....

    As I prepared for the tests at the hospital a line from my play kept running through my mind.  "Faster than you can mend the holes in the fabric of your past, it is being unraveled from the other end, stitch by stitch."  It seemed like an odd phrase to find its way into this unique experience.  I had no conscious feelings of bringing anything from my past with me into this.  I never thought that this process might be a way for me to fix something that was broken in me the same way that I was trying to fix something that was broken in my friend.  Life, however, is complicated and we don't live our lives only in forward motion.  We carry pieces from every age with us on our journey and sometimes we are made aware of their presence.  The older you get the more you understand that these pieces are important.  They are the victories or the mistakes, the joys or the heartaches that punctuate our lives. 

     As I walk the same halls where not long ago I walked hopefully, awaiting the good news that never came for someone very dear to me, I remember her and feel her presence at every turn. I would have gladly given her anything if it would have given her even one more day. I am surrounded by every stage in the regenerative process of life to death. It is overwhelming but beautiful in a way that speaks quietly, beneath the sounds of tears and laughter. There is spirit here. It fills the heart to overflowing.